Just the other day, I came across an old fortune from an arcade machine that has seen the curiosity on many faces and felt the rattle of many coins. “You may be riding the winds of change. Things may at times seem to be out of touch. Soon, they will come down to a better order.” These generic words were weaved together and, although entirely coincidental, resonated with my life so much that their ambiguity turned into specificity. Let me explain…

Six months ago, I said goodbye to life as I knew it…to my little bubble that was college. Transitioning from the cloistered rhythm of college life to the sprawling dance of the post-grad world is like stepping out from a cozy, familiar room into the beginning of a vast and unpredictable dawn. There’s a bittersweet tang in the air - the nostalgia for late-night conversations (to my college roommates: I miss you so), impromptu study sessions, and the comforting routine of semesters and breaks, all now giving way to the sharp zest of adulthood. The weight of newfound responsibility nestles into your shoulders as you pack up your college life, memories folded between clothes and textbooks. The thrill of your first job mingles with the anxiety of unknown challenges, while the independence of moving into your own place is a heady draught of freedom mixed with a hint of loneliness.

Yet, amidst this disorienting journey, there’s an underlying pulse of life, a promise that with every step taken, the foggy feeling of uncertainty will gradually lift, revealing a landscape reshaped, but richer in its complexity. One of the most trying adventures is that of self-discovery when you shed your past identity and take the form of a new one. The challenge lies not just in embracing the unfamiliar, but in reconciling it with the essence of who you once were. Ultimately, it’s a dance between honoring former versions of yourself while nurturing your emerging persona. So, my friends, if you have been feeling lost along this ride called post-grad, this one’s for you. Let’s embark on this rewarding journey of self-discovery together.

I have a confession to make: it’s quite human, this habit we have of glancing sideways, eyeing the path others tread, measuring our stride against theirs. But here’s a gentle reminder: when you compare your journey to someone else’s, you’re only seeing the surface of their story, not the sprawling, complex map of their reality. There’s a subtle peril in the act of comparison. It can lead you astray, away from the unique narrative you’re meant to write with your own days. You see, each life is a distinct melody, and when we compare, we risk drowning out the music we’re meant to make with the noise of what we think should be. Still, everything that you need to live a fulfilled life is already inside of you; there has never been a time when you haven’t been capable and worthy - you just forget. In order to get to where you desire to be, you have to remove all of those negative lies you tell yourself, because you will never compare yourself to someone else and come out even. And trying to be what you’re not takes up a lot of fucking energy. 

Focus instead on the authenticity of your story. It’s in embracing your individuality that you’ll find true direction and satisfaction. Use milestones you’ve passed as a compass, not the seemingly shining moments of another’s voyage. By nurturing your path with intention and celebrating your victories, no matter how small they may seem, you create a life that’s rich with personal meaning, not shadowed by comparisons. It’s in this harmony of self-acceptance and focused personal growth that the most fulfilling chapters of your life will be written. You’ll find a silver thread of peace woven through your days because you’re no longer chasing someone else’s dreams; you’re building your own out of the bedrock of your convictions, your joys, your trials. How do I do this? Believing in yourself is a powerful catalyst for growth and achievement. This belief isn’t just about self-confidence; it’s an acknowledgement of your potential and the understanding that each person brings a unique set of talents and perspectives to the table. When you prioritize authenticity over conformity, it not only leads to greater fulfillment, but it will also inspire those around you. 

One of the biggest lessons to come out of learning my place in this world is to be present. In the midst of life’s tumult, with its constant stream of challenges and uncertainty, finding presence and gratitude can be your anchor. Like sitting with an old friend beneath the shelter of an ancient tree, this practice can offer you solace and clarity. It’s in these quiet, reflective moments that the layers of life’s complexities begin to peel away, revealing the core of who you are and what truly matters to your heart. And gratitude? It creates a light that doesn’t erase the darkness, but illuminates the overlooked beauty of your life that quietly persists - the laughter that cuts the sorrow, the hope that sprouts in adversity, and the shared glances of understanding that shout, “You’re not alone.” You will learn that here, amidst the chaos, you have reasons to smile, to appreciate, and to love.

So, my friend, if you are feeling lost, remember this: if you overlook the small joys and beauties scattered throughout your days, the true richness of your life might go unrecognized. Take a breath, pause, and absorb the myriad hues of life’s canvas. Reflect on connections you cherish, laughter shared, and quiet moments that resonate with your soul. Give yourself permission to appreciate who you are, embracing self-compassion as the cornerstone of your contentment. Practice gratitude for the journey you’ve navigated, the personal victories, and the sweetness of your everyday routine. Notice the affection you hold for others, but also turn that warmth inward, celebrating the unique person you are. It’s in this introspection and thankfulness that life’s beauty is amplified, and what was just a glimpse will transform into a vivid, enduring presence in our daily existence.

Learn to find love in the little things. In the cup of hot tea on a fall night, and in the morning walks not to lose weight, but to hear the birds sing and to feel the warmth of the sun span your face. Learn to love the way the pages of your favorite book feel, worn with the joy of flipping through its chapters with anticipation. The way you feel when you compliment a stranger and their face lights up…and learn to love the hug of a friend you haven’t seen in ages. Learn to enjoy deep conversations with one rather than small-talk with several. For, it is in these moments of true connection with life and with others that we feel most at peace. Learning to love yourself, to cherish the little things, and to embrace life in all its unpredictability could just be the secret to feeling more at home on this wild, mysterious journey we’re all on.